Monday, May 18, 2009

Horror Stripping: "The Watch"

[19:47] Takashi Alekseev strips off his shirt for Bianca, only to draw more attention to the ROLEXXX (tm) on his wrist.
[19:50] Takashi Alekseev uses his bling-factory to reflect the stage lights right into Calie's eyes.
[19:57] Takashi Alekseev notices his watch is starting to turn his wrist green...
[19:58] Takashi Alekseev: an underlying rash starts to develop...
[19:59] Takashi Alekseev cannot find his antihistamines...he starts to swell...
[attach "Post-Thanksgiving" shape]
[20:00] Takashi Alekseev dances on.
[20:00] Takashi Alekseev: "kan I haz benadryl?"
[20:03] Takashi Alekseev 's tongue swells from the anaphylactic shock. Unable to speak, he motions desperately for his respirator mask.
[attach "Uniform Gas mask female"]
[20:05] Takashi Alekseev: the watch continues to invade his bodily systems. His hair starts falling out in large clumps.
[detach hair. Attach bald cap]
[20:07] Takashi Alekseev is unfazed. The dancing and stripping continue.
[20:09] Takashi Alekseev quickly shucks-off his slacks and throws them toward Calie, watching them sail through the air and land at her feet like a smouldering, black puddle of superfine wool.
[20:10] Takashi Alekseev: the evil watch continues its leprosy-like attack on his body, claiming his left leg.
[attach invisi-prim - l leg]
[20:11] Takashi Alekseev hops around the dancepole as best he can, unwiling to remove his wrist-accessory.
[20:15] Takashi Alekseev discards his black thong, slingshotting it over to Calie. With a great sigh, he completes his striptease before the hell-watch consumes him.
[take off underwear]
[20:17] Takashi Alekseev: the rash from his fake watch grows in intensity. His right hand bursts into flames.
[attach human torch fire prims]
[20:19] Takashi Alekseev: The fire spreads to his forearm and across his torso. Fueled by the corpulent body, the flames grow into a raging inferno on the dancepole.
[20:22] Takashi Alekseev collapses at the base of the pole. Nothing remains except the hideous watch - still it awaits its next victim.
[rez Rolexxx at base of dancepole]

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Well, this isn't right...

Yesterday, Indie Rock held an auction to raise funds for cancer research. These Relay-for-Life (RFL) events happen every now and then across the entire grid. I was made aware of this particular fund-raiser because Gattina was one of the many fabulous individuals auctioning themselves for the cause.

The amounts quickly grew beyond what I was able to pay. So be it. Each and every one of them was worth all that and more. It was unbelievably fun watching the auctions proceed. Money was an afterthought as the auctionees were genuinely afraid of the bidders (and the immediate repercussions to follow) - some auctionees started bidding on themselves in a desperate act of self-preservation... such went the evening.

I am still committed to dropping a donation into their RFL kiosk, as the cancer-monster seems to be claiming more and more of my relatives (sad but true).

Add to this the recent announcement that Linden Labs has now decreed my favorite casino games to be illegal. To recap, Linden Labs forbids gambling. Games are to be skill-based only. Apparently, Jaded Jack and Jaded Stud include a chance-element that the Lindens are not comfortable with.

So be it.

One less addiction in my life (my addictions have addictions, yes). Stud-Jack, I'll miss you and your lavish jackpots and weekly contests...thanks for the $L.

What else....I've been told that I won't be getting that snazzy new E6400 laptop at the office. In a cost-cutting measure, they'll be sending me a Latitude D630 instead. I intend to use every cycle of that poor machine.

So be it.

To counteract all the negativity, I made cupcakes with my kids today. It was suggested to me to attempt making my own frosting - which is precisely what I did this time around.

Let me just say, when you give a child a mixer-paddle coated in cream-cheese frosting, you'll get back a paddle cleaner than anything you've ever seen before.

No exotic twists on the cups this time around. Fudge-chocolate cake, cream-cheese frosting (which turned out excellent, by the way), and some chocolate sprinkles.

Thank you.

Friday, May 8, 2009


In anticipation for this Sunday, I'm formulating some ideas of getting the children out of the house so my wife can do what she has dreamed of doing since the last Mother's Day: sleep in late, eat breakfast in bed (it would technically be brunch by the time she's awake and ready to eat), and garden.

The first two objectives are to be kid-free. Child-participation for gardening is left to her discretion at the time of the event. I'll need to add my usual twist for the menus of the day...

Happy Mother's Day to all you mom's out there.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Different kind of drumstick

...but loved just as much.

I stared at the picture for....well...longer than a normal person would stare at a picture of cooked poultry.