Saturday, June 22, 2013

How To Really Hurt A Guy

This won't be a lecture about pressure-points, nerve bundles, or physical pain.

This is about going after a man's heart.

Earlier today, Patrick Lovato diedHe would be the father of Disney celebrity Demi Lovato.  Demi's personal life has been well-documented to a fault in the media and, judging by her success, she's not letting it get in the way of her blossoming career.

What I did not know, because I do not follow Demi that closely, is that Patrick divorced Demi's mother when Demi was only two.  Since then, Demi has estranged herself from any contact with Patrick.  A recent quote from Demi:

“Sometimes there are people in your life that you have to cut out. It sucks when it’s your own father. But I know what’s best for me.”

True to her word, she (as far as we know), denied Patrick the contact that he wanted right up until his very end.

I consider myself really, extremely, astronomically lucky.  I continue to love my wife and have loved her for twenty-four years.  A lot of understanding, sacrifice, and compromise on both parts is needed for a relationship this strong.  I have two incredible children and wish to be with them every second of my existence - even when I don't.  The impact I have in their lives is significant and vice-versa. 

What really scares me is not having any of that.

I do not know what marital difficulties Mr. and Mrs. Lovato had.  Perhaps it was about money.  Maybe it was about infidelity.  People seem to run into these incompatibilities 49% of the time... 

But I do know that I would do anything and everything for my daughter's forgiveness.  The article states how driven Patrick was to get just a single phonecall from his daughter.  Perhaps the wound he left Demi just festered too long.  There was no perceived benefit that Demi saw in granting this man an audience.

Patrick is gone now.  Demi can continue with her career with this part of history out of her way.  Clearly, he left this world with some regret.  Hopefully, others will recognize this and try to make their peace with their loved ones before time runs out.

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